News from the Banana Republic Times
From the Desk of the presidential pandemic response team for Immediate Release
Sterling, VA (BRT) - The office of the vice president today announced that more winning was again happening with the administrations COVID-19 response as the fourth time this week a new record number of cases was announced. A clearly elated vice president pence today announced that 46,000 new cases were reported over the country. Pence with a broad smile stated, "our policies against the virus are clearly working and records are being set". Doctor Fauci also stated that the number of new cases could swell to a 100,000 per day as pence looked on with same broad smile and a distant stare.l
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