Bleacher Bums Forum

60's today... Rain on the way..

Same as you....I am stuck here in Illinois for another 3 weeks until vacation time.

Got drunk and locked himself out of his acct 

That's funny as hell!!

Scene is Moline. Retirement condo community 39 condos like houses along a cul-de-sac street agent to woods. Deer come and go. It snows. You waddle out to the mail box and lift up the red lever for outgoing mail.  Good ol’ Ma at 85 is failing, living alone with dog Andy. Independent as a hog on ice. My brother and I are there for the hospice end, hell I’ve been there for three months. “Come in here Dog and touch her arm,” says my brother. OK, call hospice not 911 like instructed. “Pass that 1.75 Kettle One in my direction Brother. Hours go by and the bottle drains. “Shame to waste this liquid morphine,” I say. “Shame,” says my brother. Well it’s liquid let’s pour a couple of shots and see.  5 police cars, 3 ambulances, and 1 lone fire truck.  There on 1st St Court.

No, no hard feelings.  Brother is in there for three days but he comes out okay and now we’ve got ourselves a story.

Well, my brother, who is retired from a prominent government job with wife and kids, younger brother by the way, has no interest in weed or other dope. He likes a strong martini. So, I was quite surprised when he gave a thumbs up to my (a guy who has no redeeming qualities and has flunked out of four rehab programs) suggestion.  The funny thing was he told me later that he didn’t think the short shots of morphine were going to be enough.  The thing that sticks in my craw is we never got to feel any of morphine high.